The app on my phone

Nobody smells a betting app on your breath. That's what made it so easy to hide. I lost €40,000 on my phone, a lot of it in the toilets at work, between meetings. I'd come back to my desk shaking and answer emails like nothing happened.

I took out loans in my mam's name. When she found out, she didn't shout. She just sat down at the kitchen table and cried. That was my bottom.

I rang the Extern helpline the next morning.

I rang the Extern helpline the next morning. I asked my bank to block gambling transactions. I put blocking software on my phone and gave my partner the password.

I still slip on scratch cards sometimes. I'm not going to pretend. But I'm paying it back, €200 a month, and every payment feels like a small win. Mam and I go for coffee on a Sunday again.